Robin Uthappa: On Days I Felt Like Jumping Off The Balcony, Was Depressed 

On Days I Felt Like Jumping Off The Balcony, Was Depressed: Robin Uthappa 

Robin Uthappa
Robin Uthappa was an integral part of KKR (Photo-Getty)

Mental health has been a cause of concern for most human being and should be addressed on priority. Robin Uthappa, once a mainstay from the national team in the limited-overs, has seen his fair bit of ups and downs in his career and recalled the time when he was ‘suicidal’ after being diagnosed as clinically depressed.

Uthappa started his international career in 2006. He was a stagnant batsman and could provide composure to the side. His major success with Team India came back in 2007 when the national team lifted the 2007 T20 World Cup after a closely-fought win over arch-rivals Pakistan.

Robin Uthappa
Robin Uthappa (Photo by Tom Shaw/Getty Images)

Robin Uthappa: I felt like jumping off the window but something kind of just held me back

Robin Uthappa is currently in the twilight zone of his career and till 2019 has been a mainstay at the top-order of the Kolkata Knight Riders (KKR) line-up. He also shown urgency to play franchise T20 leagues across the globe and appealed to the cricket board about the same. However, in the beginning of his career, he was not ‘aware’ of himself.

Uthappa admitted that tough times has taught him a lit and he is extremely aware of himself with clear thoughts. He opened about his difficult times, and said, between 2009 to 2011 he dealt with suicidal thoughts and was clinically depressed. He, however, said cricket would keep him from such thought but on non-match day it would be difficult to deal with.

Robin Uthappa Ranji Trophy 2017/18 Karnataka Ranji Team
Robin Uthappa.

“When I made my debut in 2006, I wasn’t overtly aware of myself. A lot of learning and development has happened since then. Right now, I am extremely aware of myself and really clear on my thoughts and myself. It’s easier for me to catch myself now if I’m slipping somewhere in someplace,” Uthappa said while while speaking in the second session of ‘Mind, Body and Soul’, a platform brought forward by The Royal Rajasthan Foundation, in association with NS Vahia Foundation & McLean Hospital (Harvard Medical School Affiliate).

“I feel I ‘ve reached this place because I’ve gone through those tough phases wherein, I was clinically depressed and had suicidal thoughts. I remember around 2009 to 2011, it was constant and I would deal with that on a daily basis.

“There were times where I wasn’t even thinking about cricket, it was probably the farthest thing in my mind. I was thinking about how I would survive this day and move on to the next, what’s happening to my life and in which direction am I heading,” he added.

“Cricket kept my mind off of these thoughts but it became really difficult on non-match days and during the offseason. On days I would just be sitting there and would think to myself on the count of three, I’m going to run and jump off of the balcony but something kind of just held me back.”

Speaking about mental health should be encouraged. If you know someone, who is suffering from the same, help them overcome the problems by addressing it at priority.